The 9 Circles of Nursing School Hell

“Nursing school can be.. well, hell.  Senior year is particularly horrific.  From applying for jobs, to completing your last clinicals, to finals week, to scheduling NCLEX prep, applying for your ATT, creating your resume and cover letters, preparing for interviews, scheduling and preparing for the NCLEX, sitting for boards, and actually graduating.. it can be it’s own special form of hell.  Nine circles to be exact.

“You ever read Dante’s Inferno in high school?  . . . well, here is our version of Dante’s Inferno . . . nursing school style.” [. . .]    –Kati Kleber, NRSNG, 2016.

Read Kleber’s list of nursing school hell here on NRSNG.

The Nine Circles of Menswear Hell

“Sup, you fuckin’ mortals? When life finally logs you out due to inactivity, you’ll either be whisked away to #Menswear Heaven on the smelted down, crepe sole wings of angels or flung headlong through the infernal keyhole to #Menswear Hell. #Menswear Hell abides by it’s own rules: no gods, no masters. The #menswear legacy you left behind on earf determines what special punishment you’re subjected to for all of time. Doesn’t that sound like the brie’s cheese? If you haven’t yet read Dante’s Inferno—as I’m sure all you Kindle-having pariahs have meant to—spoilers abound.” [. . .]     –Rick Morrison, Complex, January 16, 2014.

Read Morrison’s full list of the circles of Menswear Hell here.

“Atlanta Podcasters Go To Hell With ‘The Divined Comedy’”

“‘The Divined Comedy’ is a podcast which is devoted to talking about Dante Alighieri’s Inferno one canto at a time, taking plenty of detours into pop culture along the way.

“Hosts Paul Cantrell and David Fountain began ‘midway in their life’s journey’ in July and plan on covering the entirety of Alighieri’s fantasy about traveling through the nine levels of Hell before moving on to Purgatorio and finally Paradiso. That’s one hundred cantos in all.

“Billing themselves as ‘The Only Dante Podcast You’ll Ever Need, Ostensibly,’ Cantrell plays the role of a sort of cheerleader for Dante, encouraging Fountain through his first reading of the book.

“‘For a poem that is seven hundred years old,’ Fountain said, ‘you can find a remarkable amount of modern lessons in it, and it withstands a lot of poking and prodding.'” [. . .]    –Myke Johns, WABE, August 17, 2016.

You can listen to The Divined Comedy on Podomatic.

You can check out Dante Today’s post on The Divined Comedy here.

“Document Inferno: The 9 Circles of Email Routing Hell”

“While email has been meant mainly as a communication tool, that hasn’t stopped people from trying to cram every manner of functionality into it. Unfortunately, this often leads to communication gaffes and tends to suck the productivity out of teams. Whether you’ve suffered through every level or have only had to visit one or two, we’re sure anyone who’s used email to route or work with documents will recognize these common frustrations.” [. . .]    —Ontask, 2018

Check out the full list here.

Brad Hong’s Tenth Circle of Hell

“Brad Hong is a college freshman from Morristown, N.J. His email is bradhong@sas.upenn.edu.”    –Brad Hong, The Daily Pennsylvanian, September 26, 2016.

The Nine Circles of Writing Hell

“With apologies to Dante Alighieri…

“We have all probably started ill-fated novels that, shall we say, did not go where we wanted them to go. For one reason or another, either our will or our preparation or the idea failed us, and sure enough, they ended up in novel hell.

“Based on the Nine Circles of Hell in Dante’s Divine Comedy, here are the nine circles of writing hell.

“Save your novel from these sins, my fellow writers! Repent before it is too late!” [. . .]    –Nathan Bransford, on his blog, November 23, 2010

Ukable Parodies’ Inferno Songs

“ORIGINAL SONG: ‘The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald,’ 1976 by Gordon Lightfoot, used primarily for music and meter.
PARODY COMPOSED: Archaic quasi-Italian and English lyrics by Giorgio Coniglio, May 2015.

A TRIP DOWN THE ACHERON RIVIERA

(to the tune of ‘The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald’)

Intro:

Accounts linger on from Old Testament on down

Of the fiery pit Jews call Gehenna.

You probably knew that our Dante passed through,

And the year Thirteen Hundred was when-a.

“Giustizia mosse il mio alto fattore

Facemi la divina Podestate

Per me si va ne l’etterno dolore

Lasciat’ ogne speranza, voi ch’intrate.”

The tour started badly, we recount to you sadly,

With a big screen predicting the weather,

“At this Rehab-resort, no rainstorms to report –

And you’ll surely be roasted for ever.”

Dante:

Queste parole di colore oscuro

Vid’io scritte al sommo d’una porta.

Per ch’io: “Maestro il senso lor m’e duro.”

Elli: “Qui ogne viltà sia morta.”

The ‘agreement’ on monitor, in font and hue somber

Conflicted with my inner wish-list.

“This Hotel,” it is said, “never gives up her dead.”

Virge explained, “Here all fear is extinguished.”

[…]    –Giorgio Coniglio, Silly Songs and Satire, September 3, 2015.

See Silly Songs and Satire for the full song and other Dante-themed ukulele parodies, as well as the ukulele chords for “A Trip Down The Acheron Riviera.”

The 9 Circles of Vacation Hell

“In theory, everyone likes a nice vacation. In practice, everyone who’s ever had one knows that for every moment of peace and relaxation, you’ll have to fight through mounds of stress, panic-sweat, and unexpected costs. What we’re saying is, vacations are hell. Quite literally, too: There are shocking similarities between the most famous description of biblical Hell — The Inferno section of Dante Alighieri’s Divine Comedy — and the overpriced trip you fooled yourself into taking last summer.

“Come, friend, allow us to act as Virgil to your jet-lagged Dante, as we delve deeper and deeper into vacation-themed terrors” [. . .]    –Pauli Poisuo and Winston Rowntree, Cracked, September 13, 2016

Adam Ellis’s “Levels of Hell” Meme

“Levels Of Hell is a series of exploitable images listing the nine levels of hell, as described in Dante’s Inferno, adding a mock 10th level for humorous effect.

“On October 6th, 2015, artist Adam Ellis posted an image on Facebook of Dante’s ‘9 Circles of Hell,’ as described in his “Dante’s Inferno,” the first part of The Divine Comedy. However, Ellis added a 10th level, ‘People who steal artwork and add their own watermark to it.'” [. . .]    –Matt Schimkowitz, Know Your Meme, July 2018

BuzzFeed’s “Which Circle of Hell Will You Go To?” Test

BuzzFeed-Which-Circle-of-Hell-Will-You-Go-To-Quiz

Post by Julia Pugachevsky for BuzzFeed Media (February 4, 2014).

Take the quiz here.